Monday, May 13, 2013

Blogging Confessions

So the other day Whitney wrote this post about hiding the blog from her real life friends. As I was reading through her post I was touched, because each and every word she wrote seemed as if it was my own.

Confession time. 90% of the people in my life don't know about my blog. 

Sure my roommates know a lot about it since I'm constantly using them to help me brainstorm, edit and create content. My other two best gals both read it often (one of them has a blog herself). My Mom reads it every now and again, my sisters know about it but I doubt they've ever really looked at it, and my Dad's probably in the same boat. I've shared it with a few other close friends, but generally only after they organically found it through some form of social media.

I have so many trepidations about publicly claiming this blog. First and foremost I'm afraid of what it could do to my professional career. What do employers think about a personal blog? Y'all know I never ever talk about my job on here, and I would never do anything to compromise the company I work for. But still, an employee with a blog is a bit of a liability isn't it? In this difficult job market why would I do anything that could jeopardize myself as a potential candidate *not a candidate for political office. Don't worry, I have no plans or desire to pursue that life. But I do want a career in politics, so even if I myself am not the politician, as a staffer you're still subject some elevated scrutiny of your personal life. Is this blog a political liability? I'm gonna say no, but would an employer? I'm not so sure.

More  confessions. At times I feel very self conscious about being a blogger. 

You and I both know that blogging is about so much more than sharing what I wore today or what I did this weekend. We're all here, documenting our lives, making friends and working in this creative community that gives us so much satisfaction. Blogging has added so much to my life, and I love it dearly, but to the random facebook friend? Doesn't it still look vain? "Oh... she has a blog? and she talks about makeup and sparkly things? Hmm..." And in comes the judgement.

It's freeing not to be worried about what other people think. I can write whatever I want, no matter how stupid or frivolous. Sure we all get those negative comments that sting, but I can brush it off because at the end of the day, who cares? I never have to see them in real life. But that anxiety that comes from the fear of in real life judgment, sometimes it's just too much.

So, there you have it. I'd love to hear how you have incorporated your blog into your personal life. How do you handle sharing the blog in your real life?

24 comments:

BeautyStyleGrowth said...

I'm with you. My blog is two yrs old and I still haven't shared it with my friends or family. Only very few know and I try not to remind them about it. I refuse to share my posts on my personal Face Book page

k at www.beautystyleandgrowth.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

I actually don't bring it up very often to people I'm talking to. Truth be told: if it does come up I'm embarrassed to say I have a fashion blog. I don't know why! All of us bloggers accept it of course - but sometimes I feel like "outsiders" think it's weird.

Alissa
FeelingGoodStyle.com

Carlene: Healthfully Ever After said...

This is such a nice post. I sadly don't tell people I blog, unless it comes up specifically because of what you said! I don't want to come across as so many people group bloggers into the 'vain' category. I think I'm to the point where I say 'eff it' because I love blogging. It's part of my life now.

Kristin said...

I'll admit that I don't. My husband and family know that I blog, and my family reads it on occasion, but I've really only shared my blog with other friends who blog - for a lot of the same reasons you mentioned!

I've had friends in PR and communications come across some of the more work-y pieces I've written and ask why I don't share and promote it more. It's because I still want the space to talk about my recipes, fashion, relationship details, and whatever else I feel like. Because I don't really care all that much if people online that I haven't met judge me, and because I haven't gotten to the point where I don't care about the people who I meet face to face on a regular basis judging me. I shouldn't care, but I do.

Now you've got me thinking, and I might totally steal this thought as a blog post. It's worth spending some time thinking about.

Tamara said...

I'm embarrassed, too, to admit it to other people. If you aren't a blogger, you just don't "get" it. I'm definitely hesitant to share it with people!

CWY said...

Totally understand. When I recently changed jobs, every potential employer mentioned my blog within the first 10 minutes of my interviews. I don't think it was viewed negatively at all and most liked getting to know me a little beforehand and some even mentioned that they were more interested in interviewing me based on my blog, but I also work hard to monitor the content I share for those reasons. It's a tough line. Sometimes I want to rant, but I know it's public and anyone who knows my name can easily find my blog. Most of my close friends know about my blog and read it daily, but I do feel a little awkward telling new people that I blog...

Jen said...

For me I have to be very careful what I post because of my husband being in the military. I do my best to have a good balance, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. :)

Anonymous said...

I don't bring it up either. I work at with college students and there is a fine always the fine line of how much I share with them so that personal doesn't spill over into work. A few of my friends know about my blog and follow it but it definitely isn't something I bring up a lot and I actually get a little embarrassed when my friends make reference to it.

I am glad to know I am not alone!

Alana

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

I actually did it opposite - I was sharing it on FB with people I know for over a year before I even knew there was an interactive blog community.

I am very what you see is what you get - I lay it out on the table. I do that in real life and also on my blog. It's true to who I am.

I feel like if I posted something five days a week and hid it from people, it would be like a double life.

Laura said...

ohhh man i totally feel you about being self conscious about having a blog. at my old job not a SOUL knew that i had it, i was totally sure i'd be teased for it. then when i got my new job almost a year ago i REALLY tried to hide it (since i work in apparel merchandising) but slowly but surely people have found out and i am alwasy SHOCKED at how open and interested people are! people seem to think it is so cool..which is definitely a relief! i share it more on my personal facebook now too instead of private- and get shocked every time someone from my "back home life" from high school or college send me a message saying they read & love it. i bet more people in your life than you know actually do know about it and read it!!!!! (and i'm sure love it :) ) i think as long as you don't diss your work on the blog, it shouldn't be too much of an issue in hiring. i think if your blog accurately reflects your moral code and such, then your future employers would just see it as a great creative outlet!!

Allyssa said...

This is something I think about often. Right now, no one I know in real life is aware of my blog. Oddly enough though, I have it linked to on my personal site, so I'm sure it's just a matter of time. I do wonder if it's a good idea or not though.

Unknown said...

I completely understand. I have told a select few people about my blog. My family knows, roommate and a handful of friends. I'm just too embarrassed because of that judgment (makeup & sparkles - ha that killed me)

Unknown said...

I totally know what you mean! I actually put my blog on my resume (because I do social media) and now my boss tells everyone about my blog. It has been great though because new people look at it all the time, but I still hate telling people about it. Not sure why, but I am totally self conscious about it!

Betty said...

When I first started blogging I was so excited I told my parents, my sister, pretty much anyone close to me...it was great until I realized how much blogging is about building relationships with people in the blogging world because let's face it, they're the only ones who get us! Now, I wish I could just start all over and not tell anyone!

SHUG IN BOOTS {Beth} said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Grits, Greens and Kerosene said...

I totally get this. This is why I have two blogs.

Bonjour! said...

,,,i have always remained "guarded" when it comes to my blogs. i started my first blog when i moved to DC to document and journal my new life on the east coast. subsequently, my fashion blog was born as a result of many of my friends suggesting that they missed the idea that i was not readily available for fashion advice. as a result "obsessed with polka dots" was born. i would suggest and make recommendations to any person wanting to begin blogging to choose your subjects and photos wisely. one can still be true to themselves, as i have. cheers! when do you make your way to NOLA?,,,

tara said...

my family didn't know about my blog til a few months ago! i try to keep blogging separate from real life for many reasons but mainly because it seems like non bloggers just don't understand it.

Anonymous said...

I love being a real life friend who reads your AMAZING blog! Remember how I pretty much stalked your blog before we became the friends we are today? It's great, just like you! Speaking of you, I miss you! It's been too damn long since I've seen your pretty face. I must visit DC asap. In the meantime, come to NYC/CT/MA/WHEREVER I AM.

LOVE LOVE LOVE,
#DCcallie xox

Tracy @ Honey and Nutmeg said...

I completely agree with everything you have said. Very few people know I blog. No one at my job has a clue and I would like to keep it that way. We need to have that shelter to blog freely. It is also why I do not have an fbook page for my blog, everyone has an fbook account!

Unknown said...

I thought the same as you do when I started blogging. At first I wanted to go into politics but after getting burnt out I decided to share my life with the interwebz. As long as you're not a "poltical blogger" I don't see that much harm if you put yourself out there. Just don't talk about coworkers or other Politicians & you'll be fine :)

Nat said...

It took me years to tell my friends about my blog!! I didn't mean to keep it secret I just sort of did and then a year or two went by and I was like how do I tell them now?! Even though most of them know about it they rarely read it or talk to me about it. I don't think my husband has ever looked at it. I don't openly share it but if people find it I don't really care anymore. I like that I can be myself on it and not worry about what anyone thinks so I like that most of my friends don't bother with it.

Sara said...

You just took the words right out of my mouth! I feel the exact same way. Very few of my IRL friends know about my blog and when someone does find it, I'm totally embarrassed. And I'm not sure why. I try my best to keep it under wraps at work for obvious reasons and often find myself worried about falling into the "vain" category. Regardless, I am so grateful for the friends I've met through blogging...you being one of them...and I wouldn't trade it for anything. This was a great post, Emily. Thanks for sharing. I'm so glad I'm not alone!
XO,
Sara

Anonymous said...

Wow we have this in common!! I have 2 close girlfriends who read my blog and kick my butt into gear if I fall behind, and my parents and mother-in-law are avid readers which always surprises me! Last year when I converted my blog, I wrote a very vague post on my personal facebook page, something like "I write things on a blog, if you like to read things go here" because I feel as you do - I don't want to overload people with my personal life and be judged. So when I started a facebook page for my blog, I just invited close friends. I must be pretty mysterious because just recently an acquaintace posted a link to my blog on my personal timeline and asked if it was me. Haha... woops, maybe too much anonymity!! I think we all need to feel proud of the blogs we produce and not feel nervous about what others think!

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