write a letter to someone
Dear Oliver,
Once again. Thank you for chewing my feet this morning while I was trying to appreciate my last few minutes of snoozing. One would think that for someone who sleeps 18 hours a day you would appreciate the fact I only get 7 precious hours. But no. You're hungry. Fine. I'll get up. However, maybe you should try to catch a mouse or two and eat them... I'm just saying. Mice are not toys to play with and I don't appreciate you rubbing your face all over them only to release them back into the wilds of our living room. Not cool sir. Not cool. However, please don't resort to eating plastic bags (I know they're your favorite) or string. String is for playing with, not for eating. As you well know, string may cause some discomfort towards the end of the digestive process-- and may yield an oh so awkward dingle-berry moment. I know you hate that. So put down the string already.
On that note. Thank you for being a constant source of entertainment. I don't know what I would do with out your clumsy antics and your snuggles.
Don't eat too much while I'm gone for Christmas, I'll try to do the same.
xoxo,
Emily (aka the one who found the decapitated mouse)