Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Grey

I'm feeling very grey today, for many reasons. One, the weather is the epitome of grey today. Not really raining, not really that hot or cold, just overcast and hazy. Grey. 

Two. I finished Fifty Shades of Freed last night, and OMG. I think I love the shade of Christian Grey at the very end. He's wonderful. I would like Ryan Gosling to play him in the movie please. 
He looks pretty good in that grey tie already ;)

Three.  I did a lot of thinking while I was gone. I've been really unhappy with my life lately. Not to say that I'm not appreciative of what I have/what I've accomplished, because I am. I love my friends and this city dearly. But I don't know. Call it the quarter life crisis, call it boredom, whatever. I need a major change. I'm pretty sure that means a new job, but I'm just not sure. I have a nagging feeling that a new job in DC is not the right thing. I'm about 98% sure this uncertainty is stemming from my bout with unemployment last year (four months, and several heartbreaks it's the hardest thing I've ever been through). But still. Is it time to jump ship? Head back south? Go teach English abroad somewhere? ugh. It all sounds more exciting than getting a new job in DC. 

On the other hand I love this town. I love working in politics, and I really did move here to work in policy on Capitol Hill. While I spent a whole year in the Senate, I never got to really work in policy. I really want to accomplish that before I leave (if and when I decide to move on from this town), and there's a part of me that feels like I'm failing by not having achieved that goal. 

I picked up The Happiness Project almost a year ago, and it's sat on my nightstand ever since. I brought it with me to Puerto Rico, and I have to say it's made me do a lot of thinking. I'm going to do a full review when I finish, and I may even start my own happiness project some day soon, hang tight on that front. 

Anyways enough of this stuff, I just wanted to keep y'all posted on somethings I've been thinking about lately. Change is always hard, but at this point I can't keep doing what I'm doing. I need something new. 

8 comments:

Becca said...

I'm sorry you're struggling with things right now! I promise it'll all work out somehow! I think teaching English abroad is an awesome idea, but I wouldn't suggest Spain right now- there's a ton of cuts to the program, and the economy is pretty awful. Can't wait to see what you decide to do!

Erin @ Currently Coveting said...

Hi there fellow CapFABBer.I am on book three now and it's driving me crazy! I can't put it down! I totally picture Ryan as Christian too!

XO,
Erin
http://erinscurrentlycoveting.blogspot.com

smk053078 said...

First of all...I love me some Mr. Grey!! Secondly, please go read my post from today..."Big Sister Advice"...it my help with your funk. And lastly, I am sooooo reading The Happiness Project as soon as I am done with Book 3 of Fifty!!
xo,
Shanna

Kelsey Heinze said...

Well aren't you the deep thinker this morning. This is a really brave thing to put on the blog. You should be really proud. I also wanted to share a great quote that helps me sometimes: Happiness is a form of courage.

Blue Dog Belle said...

Thanks Kelsey. That's a great quote. :)

Krista @ Blonde Aesthetic said...

Have you been to the Happiness Project's website? I haven't read the book yet, but her blog and website has a lot of really good stuff on it. I went through that feeling some last year and I found it helpful, anyway!

Blue Dog Belle said...

Oh, I would really recommend the book. I've really enjoyed it, but it makes you think about a lot, which is probably why I've been so conflicted.

Blue Dog Belle said...

Thanks love, loved that post

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